All journeys have secret destinations, of which the traveler is unaware.

I have learned to be content in whatever circumstance I am. Philippians 4:11b

9.12.2009

memories

I've been thinking about memories a lot lately.  There are things I've seen and heard and done in my life that I'd rather not remember.  I'm sure everybody has things in their lives like that.  But, if you could erase those memories, would you?  I mean, don't you wish sometimes that you could forget some things...I listened to a podcast this week by Any Stanley called "Defining Moments."  So far it's a really good series, but it has made me think of a lot of things.  He talks about how everyone has some type of defining moment in their life.  I hate that some of the people I know now have these defining moments in their lives that are bad things.  I hate that some people's defining moment is tragic.  There are people I know that will forever refer to their life as before X event or after X event.  Here's another question for you....do you have good memories that you wish you could erase?   What?!! Why would you erase good memories?  Well, what if you have memories that are good memories, but because of something that happened, those good memories cause you pain?  How good do the memories have to be to outweigh the pain they cause? 
On a different note, does it make you feel bad/guilty/whatever when you know someone that has experienced a tragedy and you look at then differently because of it?  I guess in a way it's almost impossible to not look at people differently when they've experienced some great loss.  It's not exactly that you feel sorry for them......I can't explain what I mean really.  I wish so much that there was some way to help them forget some of those memories....even if just for a little while.  I am so sad when I see them and the happiness and joy they used to have seems gone.....it's like the light they had has gone out.  I know that slowly the light will come back, but it's hard to see your friends suffering and have no way to comfort them.  I don't expect them to be happy....I certainly wouldn't be, but what do you do to bring happiness to someone that has been just demolished by tragedy?  I wish I could share the light I have with them.....I would gladly do so if I could.  I don't know what to say, so I just say "I'm  praying for you" which is true, but probably feels sort of empty to them, especially since every person they see tells them that. 
On yet another note; this is my last weekend in the United States for at least the next school year!  I'm flying out on Tuesday to go to Ghana via Detroit then NYC.  It's crazy, I know!  I almost can't believe that this time next week I'll be back in Ghana again.  So if you don't hear from me for a while on here....that's why.  If you want to get my email newsletter/updates you can email me at bethann82@gmail.com

2 comments:

Seriously. said...

Love Andy's podcasts--they are superb!

If I don't get to give you a big hug farewell at church--know that the Avery family loves you and we can't wait to see your Ghanainian again! :)

Lindsay said...

I'm taking a wild guess and assuming you're referring to us. Thank you for your compassion. I know that so many people don't know what to say or what to do. We don't either. Your prayers, and the prayers of others, is the only thing that will get us through for now. I know the light will come back...but I also know it will take some time. Thank you for your friendship. I truly consider you one of my dearest friends - even if we don't see each other often....know that you're very special to both of us.

As for the memories - I wouldn't change one of them, except one. And if I knew I could change that memory and actually change the events of that day, I would do so in a second. But, that memory will always be clear to me....and hurt everytime I remember it. It's hard to see right now, but I believe God will create a defining moment out of this. I don't like the circumstances of this evolving "defining moment" but I don't really have a choice.

Thanks again for your prayers. You will be in ours as well.

Love you BAM