All journeys have secret destinations, of which the traveler is unaware.

I have learned to be content in whatever circumstance I am. Philippians 4:11b

7.09.2009

....on being a nerd and missing "home"

I am a nerd....I have realized this before but tonight I came to the re-realization that I am in fact, a nerd. I have been working on a display for presentations etc about Ghana. I have one of those tri-fold cardboard things...you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, I want it to look like the Ghana Flag turned sideways. It took me forever to get the spacing right for the bars since the display board is twice as wide in the middle as on each side. Then it has this star in the middle right...well, it's such a simple flag, if the star looks off, then the whole thing will look, well, crappy. So being the nerd that I am, I got out my (actually it was Heidi's) protractor. That's right people, I used a protractor to measure the angles of the star in the middle of the flag so it would be as close as I could get it to "perfect." It's NOT perfect, by any means, to me it looks really crooked....but after I get the pictures and info about Ghana on there people probably won't notice the crookedness of the star. Then while I was pre-arranging the pictures, because you can't just go throwing the pictures on there all haphazardly, I really started to miss Ghana. I found myself looking at every single picture thinking about when it was taken. I'm so thankful for little things like photos. I mean, Think about it, a photo is like capturing a little tiny piece of a memory on a piece of glossy, 4x6 paper. God is so awesome in the way he created our minds. The smallest thing can pull a memory out of the depths of our minds. A smell, a taste, a photo. What if God hadn't given us the capacity for memory? I mean, a lot of animal species don't really have memory as far as we know. But humans....you can see a picture and be instantly transported back to when it was taken. When I see the pictures of Esther cooking at the school, I can almost smell the food (as cliche as that sounds). The pictures make me miss Ghana so much.
Lately I've been wondering what in the world I'd be doing if God hadn't sent me to Ghana and given me the heart to go back there in September. Would I still be working in a kitchen? Would I have finally decided to go to culinary school at the C.I.A.. And where is this all going? Where will I be a year from now....5 years...20 years? I can honestly say I have no idea what the answer to that question is....Right now, I'm hoping I'm still in Ghana. In 7 months, God has given me a love for that country and for Kumasi and the students at BCA that just amazes me. I don't know....I feel at home there. Things feel stable, and I feel useful there. Before I went to Ghana in December I was a little afraid that God would call me back there....I'm so glad he has. I can't think of anywhere I'd rather be. I guess that's about all I have to say for tonight....I need to get to bed anyway.
BAM

2 comments:

Amanda said...

I think we all have those moments of "what if I had done _______ instead of ______....wonder what would have happened??" I have always thought that God is smart enough to fix things when we don't listen, and I think that sometimes He doesn't just to make things interesting for us so-called self-sufficient humans.

I don't know. . .but isn't it funny how something you never really thought you would do has become your passion?

BAMboozle said...

funny is an understatement.....