Wow! 3 posts in one day....I know. Sorry
I've been thinking a lot lately. Maybe it's because I'm here in NC at "home" and things are just not the same as they were before I left. Mom's married & lives in a place that is totally unfamiliar to me. I don't really have a place to call my own anymore, even though my friends are awesome & I can stay with them and feel at home. Their houses aren't really MY home. Maybe it's because I'm a little worried about my brother & his family since they're having a hard time right now financially. Maybe I'm worried about people in my family that are spiritually dead. Maybe it's because I've been living in Africa immersed in bible and prayer and memory work and all that stuff. I don't know. I don't think I ever learned how to pray. As I read that, it sounds silly because as we taught the kids at camp this week....prayer is just talking to God. You can basically say anything you want or need to to Him. When I was a kid, the only thing I ever remember learning about prayer was that you do it before you eat, and before you go to bed. And there were even specific prayers for these times. You know the ones, "God is great, God is good let us thank Him for our food. By His hands we all are fed, give us this day our daily bread, Amen" and "Now I lay me down to sleep I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake I pray the Lord my soul to take (which was usually followed by a list of things I was thankful for.) Don't get me wrong, I think it's fine to teach those prayers to really young kids, to get them into the habit (initially) of prayer on a regular basis....but that's pretty much where my education on prayer ended. Until around the time I got to late High School and college. Prayer is REALLY important....and I still just don't feel that comfortable doing it. I will pray when I'm called on...but I feel awkward when I do. Like I'm fumbling over the words and not making any sense. Or I forget what I was going to say right when it's my turn to speak. How do you get comfortable talking to the creator of the entire universe.....? There are things I don't even talk to my best friends about, and I'm supposed to discuss them with God? I mean, he already knows anyway, but still, sometimes saying something out loud is just really hard. Some people seem so comfortable with prayer. Like they really are just talking to their best friend or dad and they're standing right next to them. I want to be like that. So I'm going to work on it...I'm going to make sure I talk to God more. If you don't mind, could you bring me up every now & then when you talk to Him...thanks.