thoughts....

I can't help but think about my decision to go back to Ghana a lot lately. To me, it's really not a big deal. Yet....I wonder if it will hit me someday that I'm leaving what I've known my entire life to go live in a foreign country. When I say it that way, it seems like a big deal, but it's really not to me. There are people that have told me, "oh I could never do what you're doing.." and I always think that it's just because they've never been there...I think to myself that if people had been there, and gotten to know the people I've gotten to know, then everyone would want to go live there. But I dunno, maybe that's not really true. I used to think it was strange that I'm not so much of a homebody because my mom loves being at home and doing things to make wherever she is feel more "like home." Maybe God just designed me this way. Whenever people ask me how long I'm going to stay in Ghana I don't know what to tell them. I have to say something like "until God puts me somewhere else" or something like that. The other day I almost blurted out "forever" but my brain caught it before my mouth let it go. Was that a Freudian slip? Who knows. I try to ask myself how long I am going to stay in Ghana. I honestly have no clue though. Like I said in my last post, a couple of years ago I had no clue that I'd be going back to Ghana for a 3rd time to stay for however long. I certainly can't predict what will happen in this life. I wonder how long it took people that have gone over there short-term and ended up staying, to realize that they were staying there forever. In all fairness, they've all gotten married there so they have something that ties them to Ghana. I don't have that, but I still wonder how long I'll end up there. I bet you get tired of me talking about Ghana all the time don't you? Sorry....it's just on my mind a lot lately. I'm not scared of staying there long-term anymore like I was before. I actually feel more at ease about going back to Ghana that I would feel if I was staying here in the States. I have a purpose there...and I know that the place is not where the purpose comes from but my life feels more meaningful there than it does here. enough for tonight I s'pose